Morning Coffee

Posted By Staff

Date: April 17th, 2014

Category: Nutty Jokes

folgersA little boy surprised his grandmother one morning and brought her a cup of coffee.

He made it himself and was so proud.

He anxiously waited to hear the verdict on the quality of the coffee.

The grandmother had never in her life had such a bad cup of coffee, and as she forced down the last sip she noticed three of those little green army guys in the bottom of the cup.

She asked, “Honey, why would three little green army guys be in the bottom of my cup?”

Her grandson replied, “You know grandma, it’s like on TV,

‘The best part of waking up is soldiers in your cup.’”   More Nutty Jokes

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Brain Surgery Patient’s Obamacare Plan Denies Meds, Drops Doctors

Posted By Staff

Date: April 17th, 2014

brainA New York woman suffering from a neurological disease that has required four brain surgeries has been dropped by all of her doctors and denied medications due to her Obamacare plan.

“I’ve been vomiting. I lost 22 pounds. The pain is unbearable,” said Margaret Figueroa, 49, on Wednesday.  “My medication helps me function during the day.”

Figueroa suffers from a disease known as Arnold Chiari Malformation and Syringomyelia.

Even though the Obamacare plan she purchased assured her that she was covered, her insurance card was denied when she went to fill her prescriptions.

Then she learned that none of her doctors accept her Obamacare plan. Figueroa says she cannot find a doctor who accepts her Obamacare plan; indeed, there are only six doctors in all of Staten Island who take her plan, none of whom she’s been able to get appointments with.  More

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Judge tells father to stop emailing his children in all capital letters

Posted By Staff

Date: April 17th, 2014

capsLONDON - A High Court judge in England told an “insensitive” father that he must stop emailing his children in all capital letters because it looks like he is yelling at them.

The Israeli father is in a custody dispute involving his 13-year-old son and 9-year-old daughter. During the dispute, the children have been moving back and forth between England and Israel.

The judge ordered that the father’s old style of emails, which were “equivalent to him shouting,” needed to be improved upon with the help of a family assistance officer.

“He needs help to make his messages appropriate and child friendly,” the judge said. “There’s nothing worse than an email suggestive that the sender is shouting at you.”  More

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Kittens accidentally packed in box, shipped from Los Angeles to San Diego

Posted By Staff

Date: April 17th, 2014

kittensSAN DIEGO – A Cox Communications employee was shocked after he opened a box at work and found two newborn kittens clinging to life inside.

Two kittens are recovering after they were found inside a box that was shipped from the Los Angeles area to a Cox Communications office in Chula Vista.

The two kittens were somehow packed with fiberglass equipment, loaded into a Cox Communications semi-truck and shipped from the Hollywood to San Diego County.

Cox employee JC Collins said, “They were very, very lucky that they didn’t fall out of it in transport or when we were unloading the truck.”  More

 

 

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Police using postcard to shame ‘johns’ who get prostitutes

Posted By Staff

Date: April 16th, 2014

postcardST. LOUIS – In an effort to crack  down on “johns” who are soliciting prostitutes in town, the St. Louis  Metropolitan Police Department will begin sending a postcard to men who are caught trying to pick up ladies of the night.

The postcard reminds the johns that their “lewd, lascivious and/or suggestive  behavior (including but not limited to prostitution, solicitation and  prostitution loitering) are a violation of city ordinance and state law” and  includes a court date.  More

 

 

 

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The Jaws of Life

Posted By Staff

Date: April 16th, 2014

Category: Nutty Facts

jawsThe Jaws of Life were invented by George Hurst, who was a mechanical engineer and auto racing enthusiast.

He conceived the idea after witnessing an accident at the Indy 500 where the driver died because he couldn’t be extracted from his car in time.

More Nutty Facts

 

 

 

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Man arrested after driving stolen car to court appearance

Posted By Staff

Date: April 16th, 2014

ManningSONORA, California – A California man was so desperate to get to his court appearance that he allegedly stole a car in  order to make it on time.

James Manning was arrested for stealing a 2001 Mitsubishi from a Redding auto dealership and taking it to the Tuolumne County Courthouse.

Sonora police were able to locate the car, which had a different set of license plates on it, after using a GPS tracking device.

Manning’s wife, 45-year-old Teresa Castillo, was spotted at the car and told officers that her 49-year-old husband had bought it earlier in the day for  $200.  More

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Woman sues Walmart over shampoo that caused hair to get so tangled she cut it

Posted By Staff

Date: April 16th, 2014

JenniferPORTLAND, Oregon – An Oregon woman  whose hair used to reach her backside has filed a $10,000 lawsuit against  Walmart for selling a shampoo that allegedly caused her hair to get so tangled she was forced to cut most of it.

According to Jennifer Fahey’s suit, the bottle of “Equate Everyday Clean Dandruff Shampoo” she bought at a Portland Walmart caused her hair to become  impossibly entangled in seconds.

“She was not able to remove the knots and as a result she had to cut a large  portion of her hair from the top and back of her head,” the suit states.

According to Fahey’s attorney, William Ball, the 30-year-old woman had to cut off a few feet of hair, leaving her with about  four inches, a loss he called “devastating.”  More

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Airport Baggage

Posted By Staff

Date: April 16th, 2014

Category: Nutty Jokes

baggageI couldn’t find my luggage at the airport baggage area and went to the lost luggage office and reported the loss.

The woman there smiled and told me not to worry because she was a trained professional and said I was in good hands.

‘Now,’ she asked me,

‘Has your plane arrived yet?’

(I work with professionals like this.)  More Nutty Jokes

 

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How To Survive Animal Attacks (Video)

Posted By Staff

Date: April 16th, 2014

Category: Nutty Videos

attacksWatch video at Nutty News Videos

 

 

 

 

 

 

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Cannibal Re-Arrested After Young Boy’s Head Allegedly Found

Posted By Staff

Date: April 16th, 2014

cannibalPakistan – A man previously arrested for digging up bodies and eating them was arrested again after authorities in Pakistan said they found the head of a young child in his home.

The BBC reports that convicted cannibal Mohammad Arif Ali was taken into custody on Monday morning after police in Darya Khan, Pakistan, raided his home following reports of a bad smell emanating from the residence.

“We found the severed head of a young child, about 2 or 3 years old,” Ameer Abdullah Khan, superintendent of police in Darya Khan, said.

“They probably dug up his body from a grave, but the identity of the child and the graveyard from where his body might have been stolen is not clear.”  More

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86 Million Workers Sustain 148 Million Benefit Takers

Posted By Staff

Date: April 16th, 2014

work86 Million Workers Sustain 148 Million Benefit Takers

Alleged Hillary shoe thrower detained by Feds

FBI Visiting Gun Shops to Investigate ‘People Talking About Big Government

Obama administration’s ‘Culture of intimidation’ seen in ranch standoff

Bundy:  Reid ‘Needs To Be Kicked Out Of Office’

Feds Leave Trail of Wreckage

More Standoffs Coming?

Obama Administration in Talks for Detroit Bailout

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Iran considers ban on vasectomies in drive to boost birthrate

Posted By Staff

Date: April 16th, 2014

Category: Nutty News

iran ayaIran’s parliament is seeking a ban on vasectomies and a tightening of abortion rules as the country moves away from its progressive laws on family planning in an attempt to increase the birthrate.

Two decades after Iran initiated an effective birth control program, including subsidized male sterilization surgeries and free condom distribution, the country is to make a U-turn.

Last year the supreme leader, Ayatollah Ali Khamenei (picture), criticized existing policy on contraception, describing it as an imitation of western lifestyle.

The 74-year-old has urged the government to tackle what he believes to be an ageing population and to double the number of people in Iran from 77 million to at least 150 million.  More

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Texting Driver Who Slammed Cyclist: I, Like, ‘Just Don’t Care’

Posted By Staff

Date: April 16th, 2014

davis cycleTexting Driver Who Slammed Cyclist: I, Like, ‘Just Don’t Care’

Girl makes history as mum at 12

Teen who carried dead tot into store could get murder charge

Woman banned from keeping animals

Denver woman shot dead while on phone with dispatcher for 13 minutes

Monica Jones, Transgender Woman, Convicted Of ‘Manifesting Prostitution’

Distinctively tattooed neo-Nazi identified as suspect in knife attack outside CA bar

Tennessee woman, missing since 2011, found walking along Miss. 613 in Big Point

Watch:  Burglar Caught on Tape Creeping in Baby’s Room

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Cockroaches Rain From Ceiling at Blue Ribbon Sushi

Posted By Staff

Date: April 16th, 2014

roachesSpring has sprung — and so have the creepy critters all over Soho.

Two weeks after a mouse infestation forced the shutdown of Dominique Ansel Bakery on Spring  Street (it has since bounced back with a triumphantly themed “Rocky” cronut), Blue Ribbon Sushi on Sullivan is having a cockroach crisis, the Observer has  learned.

A male  diner was having lunch at the maki and sashimi joint on Monday when a roach fell  from the ceiling and landed on his table, followed by four others.

“These  weren’t small cockroaches,” he told the Observer, poising his thumb and  forefinger about an inch away from each other to approximate the size of the  bug. “A person from the restaurant said, ‘Maybe it’s about to rain, this hasn’t  happened before.’”  More

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Doctor Took Naked Pictures Of His Patients

Posted By Staff

Date: April 16th, 2014

bectonAn Arkansas gynecologist is facing video voyeurism charges after he allegedly used his cell phone to take nude photos of patients during office exams.

Police began investigating Paul Becton, Jr. earlier this month after a patient told cops that she was concerned that the 68-year-old doctor “produced his cellular telephone and took photographs of her pubic region and buttocks” during an office visit, according to an arrest affidavit.

Armed with a search warrant, Arkansas State Police investigators seized Becton’s phone during an April 10 visit to his office in Paragould, a city about 20 miles northeast of Jonesboro.

A subsequent analysis of Becton’s phone revealed “numerous images of nude females that appear to have been taken in a medical office during medical examinations.” The photos were found “in the deleted images within the hard-drive” of the phone.  More

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Man Licked Cop’s Eye While Resisting Arrrest

Posted By Staff

Date: April 16th, 2014

Christopher Nicholas Hiatt.Montana – Christopher Nicholas Hiatt, A 34-year-old Montana man, is locked up in lieu of $45,000 bond after allegedly licking the eye of a police officer seeking to arrest him Saturday night outside the Pisser’s Palace tavern.

Police encountered Hiatt after he called 911 to report a theft.

After discovering that Hiatt had an active arrest warrant from a neighboring county, officers sought to arrest him.

According to investigators, Hiatt struggled when cops sought to handcuff him.  More

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Toddler, goes missing from apartment, gets stuck inside claw machine

Posted By Staff

Date: April 16th, 2014

clawLINCOLN, Nebraska – Authorities say a toddler has been reunited with his mother after employees found him playing inside a claw crane machine at a Nebraska bowling alley.

Lincoln police say a 24-year-old woman called 911 Monday afternoon because her 3-year-old son was missing from her apartment.

Employees at the bowling alley across the street meanwhile called police to say a small boy was playing with stuffed animals inside the coin-operated machine.

It was unclear how the boy ended up inside the claw crane machine.  More

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Mobile brothel catches fire at rest stop

Posted By Staff

Date: April 16th, 2014

truckGermany – A mobile brothel caught fire in a motorway rest stop while the owner was busy conducting business with a truck driver in his cab.

Police and around 35 fire fighters were called to the scene after the mobile home burst into flames at the lay-by near Horneburg, Germany.

The female brothel owner parked up at the site as it was a convenient spot for her to offer erotic services to clients.

The 32-year-old brothel owner known as ‘Lady Jane’ was fortunately conducting business with a truck driver in his cab when her ‘Love-Mobil’, which had included a bed and various erotic aids, caught fire.  More

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High School teacher arrested on a DUI charge as she drove to work

Posted By Staff

Date: April 16th, 2014

Nancy VaughnAn Estero High School teacher was arrested on a DUI charge as she drove to work Monday morning, Lee County sheriff’s deputies said.

Nancy Vaughn, listed as a reading teacher on the school’s website, had blood alcohol content readings of 0.26 and 0.27, more than three times the legal limit, at 9:11 a.m., about two hours after deputies pulled her over in Estero, according to a Lee County Sheriff’s Office arrest report.

Deputies said Vaughn, 57, of Bonita Springs, was swerving across lanes at 20 mph on Three Oaks Parkway, about a mile from Estero High School, when a deputy stopped her at about 7 a.m., roughly the same time as the start of school.

Vaughn told deputies she hadn’t consumed alcohol or taken any prescription drugs, and that she was driving 45 mph en route to her job as a teacher, the report said.  More

 

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North Korean officials complain about salon owner’s poster mocking Kim Jong-un’s hairstyle

Posted By Staff

Date: April 16th, 2014

badLondon – A hairdresser in west London was confronted by two men claiming to be officials from the North Korean embassy earlier this month after putting up a promotional poster making light of dictator Kim Jong-un’s distinctive coiffure.

The trouble started when Mo Nabbach put up an image of Kim sporting a military salute, a grin on his face, and his trademark short-back-and-sides, long-in-the-middle look.

The poster’s lettering said, “Bad hair day? 15% off all gent cuts through the month of April. Tuesday-Thursday.”

 One day, Nabbach told the London Evening Standard, two men came by the shop window and began making photographs and taking notes. The men then entered the house and told Nabbach to take the poster down, claiming it was “disrespectful,” to their leader.  More

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